No matter how many times you tell your kids, parents, partner, or friends you love them, nothing beats hearing a detailed description of exactly what it is you love about them.
So why don’t we do this more often? Why do we wait until someone dies to describe all the things we loved about them?
Here’s what I think. People are squirmy people are about expressing love. It makes them feel weak. Even people who say “I love you” a lot usually blurp out the words as quickly as possible and then roll over or dash out the door.
Today’s Tricky Tuesday is about slowing down, taking time to feel, and expressing love in a more meaningful and memorable way.
By meaningful and memorable, what I really mean is specific. I don’t want to be told “I love you because you’re so nice.” I want to be told: “I love you because when I was falling apart over a break-up with someone nobody liked, you flew out to take care of me until I was back on my feet.” That’s the kind of “I love you” I’m talking about.
If you would like help saying “I Love You” in a more meaningful way, the I’m Loving You Ecard is a great way to do it.
Imagine this. It’s a hot August night. You’re 19 years old. You’re sitting alone in your first apartment and you’re feeling great. Two weeks ago, you were driving a U-Haul full of books, and clothes, and second-hand furniture from Idaho to Minnesota. And now, two weeks later, you’re sitting in your very own kitchen with all your stuff organized and everything in its place.
All of a sudden you notice a neat stack of cardboard boxes tied together with twine. And that gets you thinking about how much you love Mike for going the extra mile that weekend to make your life easier.
So you write him an I’m Loving You Ecard. Here’s how that might look:
As you can see, the love is in the details. Sally could easily have sent Mike a generic Hallmark card with the words “Thanks” or “I love you” inside. If she had, Mike would have read those words; maybe he would have smiled; and then he would have tossed the card in the recycling. I doubt he‘d even remember to say “Thanks for the card” the next time he saw Sally.
But because Sally took the time to send a card that described in detail the things Mike did that made her feel special, he’s actually going to feel loved when he reads it.